Human Design Compatibility
There are a number of different ways we can look at compatibility in Human Design. My personal view on compatibility overall is that we can all be in a healthy relationship with anybody - all relationships come with their challenges and their ease. I don’t love the fearmongering that tends to happen around compatibility that says, “x type of person and x type of person will never work together, it will always be awful!” Pft. Anyway…
Some people believe that type for type is the best scenario in HD. I don’t really agree with that, because it depends so heavily upon how much each party is in their authentic self and how much they are in their not-self. Two Manifestors together could be really lovely…or, they could simply destroy each other. Etc.
We can look at profile resonance. 1st lines vibe well with 4th lines, 2nd with 5th, and 3rd with 6th. Therefore, the most harmonic profile combos for a couple would be: 6/2 and 3/5, 1/3 and 4/6, 2/5 and 5/2, 1/4 and 4/1, 2/4 and 5/1, 6/3 and 3/6. There is commonality here. Though the harmonic lines will be on a different journey, there is the ability to relate to each other. I myself don’t look to this a whole lot because there is a myriad of ways to be compatible and incompatible with someone, but I do think it’s worth mentioning.
For me, if we’re talking relational questions, I’m pulling up a connection chart. Here’s the connection chart for my spouse and I as an example:
At the bottom lefthand corner, you’ll see a Connection Theme. Connection themes are formed by how many centers are defined and undefined when the two charts come together. Corey and I make 7-2, because together we have 7 defined centers and 2 undefined. Here are the descriptions for each connection theme:
Don’t be discouraged if you and your partner create one of the “less desirable” connection themes (7-2, 6-3, 5-4). Any relationship entered correctly via strategy and authority is correct, regardless of the theme you create. Having awareness of the potential challenges and strengths of your connection theme will do nothing but serve you. And, for what it’s worth, almost every significant relationship in my life creates 7-2, including my spouse and my best friend of 20+ years
You’ll notice also that underneath the chart, there are four different types of Connection Channels:
Compromise Channels - This is where one person has a full channel and the other person only has one of the gates in that channel. This can be tough energy to work with, because the person with the full channel is always going to be pulling the person who only has the gate, creating a sort of push-pull energy. With awareness, you can come to a space where you just kind of let each other be in these areas, and understand that you likely aren’t going to see eye to eye here and that’s okay. You can honor both of your energies.
Dominance Channels - This is where one person has a channel and the other person has openness. When together, the person with the channel with be naturally conditioning the person without it on an energetic level. The person with openness has a really cool opportunity here to experience energy that they otherwise do not have access to, and as long as they don’t try to force themselves to become The Best At It, they can enjoy exploring it while also admiring this quality in their beloved.
Companionship Channels - This is when both people have the same channel. This is not energy that is attracting per se, because we are wired to seek diversity. This isn’t an exciting energy. What it can offer, though, is ease, stability, and an overall sense of comfort. You share the same strength and weaknesses in this area. While this won’t be the thing that attracts you to someone else, I feel that it can be super beneficial in a long-term connection.
Electromagnetic Channels - This is where each person has one gate on either side of a channel, and together they create the whole channel. This type of channel connection has an extremely intense magnetism to is, especially at first. You each want what the other has, and then you come together to create a new third thing. This can veer very much into the love/hate territory, depending on how both parties handle this energy. With each person having a different gate, you are both bringing very different energies and perspectives to the table. Can you respect the difference while also respecting the thing you create together? Or will the difference be one of those things where you loved that quality in them at first but now you hate it?
The last thing I’ll mention it looking at your two charts together to see where you might light each other up in terms of the nine centers. For example, if you look at our connection chart above, you’ll see that I have a defined solar plexus and my husband does not. Here’s an image labeling all the centers just in case:
The population is pretty much split 50/50 in terms of solar plexus definition, so it’s very likely that you are close to someone who has the opposite of what you have. Wherever we have openness in our chart, we take in the energy of those who have it defined and we amplify it. So, whenever Corey and I are together and in each other’s auras, I am conditioning him emotionally. What this looks like in real life is that I’ll be bopping around with a low level of casual annoyance at something - typically wholly unrelated to Corey and our relationship. He will feel that annoyance physically in his body, and if he is not very aware of his own emotional state before I come into the room, he might feel it, amplify it to anger, and think it belongs to him. The mind is also super great at picking a reason that the feeling actually does belong to him. So his mind could assign a reason to this false anger he’s now feeling, and then he might engage with me, and boom! Unnecessary fight.
So, you can see how rad it is to know where you might be conditioning each other via your respective definition.
Like I mentioned earlier, I believe that anybody can be with anybody. To me, the most important thing when it comes to relational dynamics is awareness. Human Design can really give us a great gift in this way. If we can understand how another is designed to show up in the world, perhaps we can have more compassion and grace for them, and perhaps they can do the same in turn for us. You can use the connection chart to check out your romantic relationships, your friendships, and your familial connections.
“You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.”
― Thich Nhat Hanh
